Soap, Men, and Alan Ladd--All on the Same Page!

Being on the same page.
When I ponder being on the same page, I think of an experience I had last year. I was enrolled in an online Pre-Calc Class for two separate semesters. What I failed to notice was that the two semesters used different editions of the same textbook. When I went to do my homework, the problems didn't make any sense. I was entirely frustrated and didn't do my homework for a few months. I was so convinced that the class curriculum was wrong. I knew I wasn't wrong! I later came to find out that neither was necessarily wrong, it was just that we were on different pages.
Being on the same page is obviously important in persuasive writing. If two people aren't on the same page, understanding one another and communicating respectfully, the result will be stagnation and frustration.
In terms of food, being on the same page is important as well. I heard of a man who once went to a restaurant in a South American country and ordered "el jabon."He meant to order "la jamon," or "ham". Instead he ordered "soap." Perhaps my memory is embellishing the story, but I believe the waiter brought him a bar of soap on a plate, as if to say "Silly Gringo, soap is for idiots!" Another man wandered Columbia, lost on a study abroad program, telling restaurant owners, "Tengo Hombre!" He meant to say "Tengo Hambre"--"I have hunger." He was really telling them, "I have man."
Clearly, being on the same page linguistically is important when ordering food. Communication is also important within a single language. I remember eating at a restaurant where everything you ordered came out three sizes bigger than you anticipated. One of our party ordered a burger. We expected to see a dead cow fried between two planks of bread. It came out, a singular burger about the size of a poker chip. It stood alone, the nonconformist burger that never flinched as the rest of the table burst into laughter. It was like Alan Ladd in the movie Shane, standing strong and proud, alone on the wild plane of a porcelain plate. Funny thing, Ladd was barely taller than five feet. Alan Ladd, the burger, was also confident in it's own size.
Communication is important. Being on the same page is important. That's all I have to say. If you'll excuse me, I've gotta run by McDonald's and pick up an Alan Ladd with fries.